* * *
He was fighting so hard
Whirling and spinning and kicking and punching
Adrenaline pumping hard too
Everything around him not slowed a beat
But every moment sharp and clear
Going so fast he didn't feel in charge of his body at all
Rather trapped inside it watching everything unfold
They fell before and around him and were replaced by others
A blaster was in his hand then a knife then nothing
He shot and stabbed and hit over and over and over again
And then he was looking down at the bodies
And the stormtrooper helmets were all split in two
Behind them:
The dead faces of anyone he'd loved

He'd just killed them


Cassian's limbs jerked and twitched; his breath came hard, punctuated with occasional staccato vocalizations; mostly motionless, still very clear he was caught in and fighting hard against something

until he suddenly screamed aloud, his whole body jerking, and his hand flung out and slammed into the side table.