Date: 2019-09-15 04:11 am (UTC)
candor1: (NiJedha . you can't take them away. down)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He was a little startled. Then smiled back. "That's how I feel, too."

Again, possibly the drugs doing a bit of the talking… not in the content of what he said; more being able to say it unvarnished. (And the scope—they weren't talking about going any further than an embrace, right?) "How's this… You can believe when I say yes, because I promise when I need to I'll say no. …You'll have to take on faith that I know the drugs aren't a problem for that. They might actually be helping… me be that honest."

Date: 2019-09-15 04:57 am (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . Jyn . that's it)
From: [personal profile] candor1
Tell me how you want me… That sentence could have made him stop. It was what his side of such situations usually was. But from her… with the foundations she'd already established—that she wanted, too, but in order to relax into that, wanted the roadmap of his boundaries… he'd been on that side of things, too. So, he did trust her. (Again: how long had they known each other…?) More than he would himself, not to self-sacrifice or self-ignore. He would trust her to say no, as well. Yes, on the same page.

So, still paying close attention for any physiological signs from her that might indicate discomfort, he finished what he'd started: moved his arm gently between her and the mattress, until his shoulder was under her head. It brought their bodies nearly flush together. But he didn't press; he left that last little bit of distance up to her. He did tilt his head just enough that he felt the brush of her hair against his face. And his other arm, he brought up, so his hand could light carefully on her side, as she'd allowed hers to be guided onto his.

He said softly into her hair, "Still okay?"

Date: 2019-09-15 05:36 am (UTC)
candor1: (Yavin . smile . I'm not used to)
From: [personal profile] candor1
"Yeah." Even if he hadn't said anything, his deepening breathing and slowing heartrate would be an answer.

Bodies were ridiculous. Lying wrapped up with someone else made you so much more compromised and vulnerable, to them and anything else; but it made you feel so much safer and secured.

Right now, he embraced the ridiculous. It had been so long since he'd felt this.

Out of nowhere, he thought suddenly of the phantom on the other side of the notes—the artifacts—the vibroblade. Wondered if (she?) they had ever had this, might be having it now with someone else, too.

His mind couldn't stray much, though. —Another benefit, another miracle. He could get outside himself and focus on her: her breathing, her shape, her warmth. He simultaneously felt he could fall into a deeper, more restorative sleep, and wanted to stay awake so he could stay aware of this; every moment.

The arm attached to the shoulder under her head bent a little, to be somewhat around her, resting lightly against her back—without trying to pull or gather her in closer. Just, there.

"Would have been nice to get here differently," he said softly, "but I'm glad to be here, right now."

Date: 2019-09-15 11:33 am (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . Jyn . that's it)
From: [personal profile] candor1
The light vibration of her hum, the nonsense script she wrote on him, sank him deeper into the bed and brought a smile to his lips.

He wanted suddenly to kiss her—not even her mouth, but her hair, her forehead. He refrained. But he resettled his head on the pillow and his face against her, so his cheek brushed and rested against the top of her head. …And it had something of the same feel. Good thank you.

Date: 2019-09-16 02:55 am (UTC)
candor1: (Jyn . civ . bw . haven)
From: [personal profile] candor1
As slightly as she shifted nearer, he slightly welcomed her; a further loosening of muscles and gentle release of breath, melting them together.

His arm momentarily tightened, no more than a pulse, around her, before lying beside her again; no impediment should she want to move away. He breathed back, "I know. …You, too."

Date: 2019-09-16 03:27 am (UTC)
candor1: (Cadera . escapology . down)
From: [personal profile] candor1
Thank him? But he knew not to dismiss it, and she'd already discouraged his further thanking her. So…

This time, hoping it communicated what it was meant to and nothing more, he did it. Tilted his face and pressed the lightest of quick kisses to the top of her head.

Date: 2019-09-16 04:19 am (UTC)
candor1: (Yavin . smile . I'm not used to)
From: [personal profile] candor1
The tightening of her arm filled him with relief. He rested his head, all of him, against her; felt the hole in his chest momentarily filled with her in his arms, and let himself sink under the waves of their breathing—which now needed no deliberation at all to become the same.

Date: 2019-09-16 04:47 am (UTC)
candor1: (bw . scar)
From: [personal profile] candor1
Peaceful as this made him, there was still some detoxing to do. Over the rest of the night, he would have occasional fits of shivering. He certainly sweat more than he would have liked. But there were no more night terrors. Once he woke and had to slip quickly away, get to the 'fresher, and empty his stomach. He took the opportunity to shower off a bit. He returned to the bed damp, but freshly rather than clammily. He slipped, smooth and silent, back beside her; and, if she didn't move away, his arms back around her. His skin felt finally cool, not just from the washing but from the fever having broken.

Date: 2019-09-16 05:06 am (UTC)
candor1: (Jyn . au . shower)
From: [personal profile] candor1
"A lot," he confirmed, quietly back. It was harder not to pull her close—remembering, though he'd only been half-awake at the time, her doing so to him; steadying him until he stopped shaking. But he wouldn't. It was wonderful enough to have her in his arms while they lay passive, putting no strength into enveloping her, letting her dictate how much contact the rest of their bodies made. He felt abashed she'd chosen to do so while he was unwashed and perspiring, and hoped he'd repaid her a little by being cleaner, now. "How about you? Get any sleep?"

Date: 2019-09-16 05:26 am (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . Jyn . one with the Force)
From: [personal profile] candor1
His arms did tighten around her, in response to her movement or her words; a quick hug or a lapse of self-control. Either way, he relaxed his grip at once—nothing she couldn't leave easily, ever—but didn't shift away from how close it left them.

"I'm glad. Me, too."

Date: 2019-09-16 05:56 am (UTC)
candor1: (Kafrene . street)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He closed his eyes, rested his head against her hair, drank in the feeling of the patterns she carved on him.

Safe.

The honest answer might be, Never.

…Or was it? When that was, for him more than for many… a choice? Even a goal?

(It could be pointed out that is was also less a choice for him than for others, still. So it was with… everything.)

Either way—whatever his life would be like if he didn't choose this one, better or worse—he chose to walk where others shouldn't have to. Which was rarely safe.

But from this threat, these assailants, she'd saved him. If he ever needed to reengage, he'd have better prep, a better plan, and possibly backup.

"I'll be able to get back to my people," he said softly, at last. "Thanks to you."

It was the best answer he could give. Even if it wasn't one.

Date: 2019-09-16 06:20 am (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . smile . proud of you)
From: [personal profile] candor1
The kiss he pressed to her this time was just as light, just as gentle, but lasted a whole heartbeat, and brushed the skin of her temple, not just her hair. "Yeah," he murmured in agreement. I know.

His heartbeat faltered a little. The faintest of tensions—apprehension?—ran through him. Though his voice was (practicedly) unchanged when he said quietly, "We're always looking for good people. If you're ever interested in… a job. With a group that tries to work against the ones taking advantage. …I'd certainly vouch for you."

Date: 2019-09-16 06:52 am (UTC)
candor1: (Scarif . smile . do you think . down)
From: [personal profile] candor1
He wasn't sure there was a single, direct interpretation of that. But somewhere in the mix—of a dry but gentle decline—there was, maybe, what he felt too. The wish (the hope) it could actually happen. And the willingness, however unlikely, to live in that hope a little longer.

He tightened his arms around her again, and released again; a hug to indicate her words accepted. The matter closed. "Okay."

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